Are you present in your relationships?

Hello my dear friend,

This article written by Christy Wright talks about how to be present in your relationships. This caught my attention because distraction is the name of the game for me, especially when I am at home. She offers 8 ways to stay focused and present in your relationships.

1- Ditch the guilt Stop feeling guilty about where you are; enjoy being where you are and what you are doing. Don’t carry the guilt of things you can’t take care of at the moment.

2- Stop Multitasking I used to think I was pretty awesome that I could do two things at once. Not so much anymore because it really does not work out the way I want it to. Multitasking minimizes our connections with each other.

3- Take time to play Women, this is especially important. Taking time to play helps us stay or get back into our feminine energy which is where we are our best selves. When you play, you are more joyful, relaxed, and it is easier to connect with the people around you. Playfulness creates memories.

4- Set boundaries around your phone Here are a few ideas on how to do that:

-Put your phone in a box when you get home. Keep it there until the kids are in bed or after family dinnertime is done.

-Use the “do not disturb mode.” This keeps your phone available for emergencies or for that amazing picture, but keeps you disconnected from the outside world.

-Ask this simple question When you are tempted to check your phone, ask this question: “Is it more important that I know what the outside world is doing right now, or is it more important that I experience what I am doing right now?”

-Try “The Pivot” When you are looking at your phone and someone comes into the room, that human being should take priority. Your head should automatically pivot from your phone to that person and give them your full attention.

5- Get rid of distractions Phones are usually our biggest distraction, refer back to #4. Sometimes the people closest to us are big distractions too (our children, especially our little ones). It is ok to set boundaries with them when you need to get something done, need some adult time, or a time out for you.

6- Don’t let your thoughts wander A Harvard study found that people aren’t really paying attention to what’s right in front of them 47% of the time. You have the power to control your thoughts and what your brain is focusing on. Learning how to control your thoughts is called mindfulness. A way to practice mindfulness is to ask “What is right in front of me?” By doing that, it will redirect your thoughts.

7- Look people in the eyes When your spouse is telling you about his/her day, or your kids are tugging on your clothes to get your attention, look them in the eyes. They feel that connection with you and that moment can become a moment of quality time. Try being fully present in the small moments and see what happens in your relationships.

8- Ask questions The better question gets a better answer! One way to gain attention from your family or friends is to ask a question, and more importantly, listen to their answers. This shows you care, you are interested in what they have to say and can spark another question. You might be surprised by what you learn from them.

I hope you were able to find something helpful in this email that will improve your ability to be present and improve your relationships.

Have a wonderful week!
Much love and gratitude, Janalee

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